Getting sexdates online via dating sites

Perhaps a single, stylish, independent, free-thinking woman in her mid-40s was a scary proposition – was I going to make a move on friends’ husbands, or was I going to put unwanted ideas of independence into my girlfriends’ heads? I’d heard plenty of horror stories, but I’d also heard stories of friendships, marriages and long-term partnerships between people who’d met online. You get to email and phone before deciding whether to meet. I love words, so for me writing and receiving long emails was a great way of finding out about a possible date. I was looking for a bit of confidence-boosting and excitement.I’m a glass-half-full kinda girl, so I focused on the positives. I find life so much more fulfilling and rewarding that way. If you open up the site with a big sigh and a negative soundtrack of words in your head, what do you expect? I wanted an education and sex, and that’s what I got. Be realistic and write about what you’re really good at.

Be honest with yourself about your needs and expectations. Talk about your family commitments, say if you smoke, and don’t say fitness is important to you if it’s not. Trying to impress someone by being less than truthful is unattractive. When we know our values, those things that are key in our lives, we find it easier to know what we want in a relationship. Don’t go into it imagining that you’ll find your lifelong partner immediately. Play your favourite music and have a glass in hand!

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My first post-marriage love affair was with a guy I knew at university back in the day.

We met thanks to Facebook – yes I know, such a cliché! I was grieving for so much: my marriage was over, my kids were growing up, I was getting older, I was midlife with few prospects and yet not ready for the nursing home.

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